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a future single mother's child question?

 
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asinglemothersson



Joined: 05 Jul 2006
Posts: 3
State or Province: Indiana

PostPosted: Wed Jul 05, 2006 3:41 pm    Post subject: a future single mother's child question? Reply with quote

hello, my mother is talking about leaving my step-father because he goes golfing 3 or 4 times a week and almost every time he comes home he is drunk or close to being drunk (he is not an alcoholic he is drinking w/his buddies and only drinks when he is at the golf course) and he is also selfish at times and somewhat controlling i mean my mother can go shopping and visit her friends and me and my other 2 siblings can do everything that every other good kid can do (visit friends ride bikes play video games spend the night w/friends) but when i say controlling i mean he has to know what your doing when your doing it who's it with so he not really controlling he just keeping an eye on things atleast it seems like it to me.

i do give my support to my mother and she decides to leave him i will be right behind her. but when she leaves that will make me the man of the house she wants me to split rent w/ her if we got an apartment. but if she does this i will have to give up everything that i wanted to do like going to college, i want to go to a technical school in pennsylvania to paint cars but i would not be able to bcuz if she leaves i will be afriad something will happen to her and my sisters and i feel like i should be there to prtect them and take care of them. if my mom decides to leave him then i am willing to work 2 jobs just so our lifestyle doesnt have to change and so my sisters wont be greatly affected from going to having cable tv, cable internet, name brand clothes, etc to having close to nothing other than what they got. even though i know we will all have to make sacrifices in order to make ends meet but i feel like that it will be my responsabillity to my mother and my sisters is to provide for them so they wont have to make a big adustment. so am i taking on too much? am i being selfish about giving up my future? should i do what i feel like i have to do? i am really confused and your help would be greatly appreciated.
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FamFreedom



Joined: 06 Jul 2006
Posts: 5
State or Province: Pennsylvania

PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 2:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You should talk to your Mother about this. Tell her how you feel...that it is something that "concerns" you.

Also, it looks like there needs to be an intervention for your stepfather (with his drinking)....it is affecting the family.

Let him know that. No one may have actually verbalized it to them yet.
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asinglemothersson



Joined: 05 Jul 2006
Posts: 3
State or Province: Indiana

PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 3:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

thanks for your help

i have already talked to her but it wasnt really a talk i pretty much told her that if she left him i would be right behind her and that i would not go to school in pennsylvania or anyother out of state school i would just go to a community college thats in a town about ten minutes away even though i dont want to since it doesnt offer what i want but i will do something else that intreste me.
about having a intervention w/ my step father my mom has left him b4 bcuz of this reason and thats part of the reason she id considering leaving him again for good so he knows why my mother would be leaving but i also feel that i would be holding her back from what she wants to do and i would rather her be happy than me be happy. but thanks for your help.[/quote]
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myzima2000



Joined: 07 Feb 2006
Posts: 74
State or Province: South Carolina

PostPosted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 8:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

does your state have a lottery because if that is so you may be able to go to school on that and you also may qualify for grant money to go to school. i dont see why you cannot go to school part time and still help your mother out with rent and whatever. check into different ways of getting your education there are programs out there that can help you but dont give up on your dreams. your dreams are what keeps us going good luck
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