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HELP PLEASE!!!

 
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ElizabethBarton



Joined: 09 Sep 2007
Posts: 1
State or Province: Utah

PostPosted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 3:37 pm    Post subject: HELP PLEASE!!! Reply with quote

Hey Ladies! I really need your help here!
I am a single mom and I need to know my rights. The father is somewhat active when he wants to be. He is not on her birth certif and paternity has NEVER been established. There is no doubt that he is her father but i need to know if there is anyway he can fight for custody? I live in UT if that matters?
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Sterling



Joined: 18 Feb 2006
Posts: 77
State or Province: Texas

PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 8:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes, he can always go for custody. He would have to file suit in court of the county the child lives in to establish paternity, custody, child support, etc...

As of right now without him establishing paternity in court he has no rights but can get them if he asks the court for them.
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CalsMom



Joined: 19 Oct 2007
Posts: 6
State or Province: Tennessee

PostPosted: Fri Oct 19, 2007 1:26 pm    Post subject: In the same place Reply with quote

I am in the exact place as you with my 16 month old daughter. He does by childsupport but its not through court. He hasn't done anything yet and we totally work around his schedule. I live in constant fear he will get her. If you hear anything else on this let me know .
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alabamauk



Joined: 02 May 2008
Posts: 2
State or Province: Not Applicable

PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2008 4:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hey all!! I live in the uk!! I am in the same situation. he comes and goes as he pleases!! he kicked me out when i fell pregnant and told me to have an abortion ( it brings tears to my eye writing that because I wanted them so badly) to this day he still say it in his words 'we wouldn't have this problem if i'd got rid'. he provides no financial support and goes weeks without seeing them (i have twins) but has suddenly decided he wants to see them and is throwing his weight around to get what he wants!! I don't want my boys to see that kinda behaviour!! they are precious and loved. they are so precious and he is so abusive!!!!!!!!!!! wot can i do????????????????
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lakotamom



Joined: 08 May 2008
Posts: 5
State or Province: Alabama

PostPosted: Fri May 09, 2008 1:21 am    Post subject: alabamauk Reply with quote

alabamauk wrote:
hey all!! I live in the uk!! I am in the same situation. he comes and goes as he pleases!! he kicked me out when i fell pregnant and told me to have an abortion ( it brings tears to my eye writing that because I wanted them so badly) to this day he still say it in his words 'we wouldn't have this problem if i'd got rid'. he provides no financial support and goes weeks without seeing them (i have twins) but has suddenly decided he wants to see them and is throwing his weight around to get what he wants!! I don't want my boys to see that kinda behaviour!! they are precious and loved. they are so precious and he is so abusive!!!!!!!!!!! wot can i do????????????????


I would suggest you go to child services in the county you live and persue
child support, this will establish legally paternity.
Document everything! Check laws in your state on recording phone conversations...in my state phone recording is legal...by all means don't let him realize this. Check out his criminal background, your courthouse may have a public computer, this may provide criminal info you had no idea existed, make copies of.
If you can afford an attorney, find a good one that GETS custody and IN with your family court judge. Learn what that judge LIKES in a parent and be that. If you have problems such as drinking, drug use, party girl behavior, etc STOP!!!! Before you start this process....

REMEMBER THIS!!!! as a good mother and woman you want to fair, that's what a good mother does....DON'T for the sack of your children trust anything he say's!!!! Please, listen. He may not be aware of what all a man can get in family court, but, he could learn from a friend or a co-worker or a father in a groc line HOW TO GET YOUR BOY'S.....

I read a book "How To Win Your Custody Battle" it is worth trying to obtain.

Be careful friend and God Bless,
lakotamom
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Mom of one



Joined: 17 Jun 2008
Posts: 12
State or Province: Alabama

PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 8:47 pm    Post subject: Help Please Reply with quote

Ladies-

First and foremost, the Father would have to take a paternity test. Should he be proven he is the Father, then yes, he would have visitation rights and he would have to pay child support. He could also have to provide life insurance on his life for the benefit of the child and he could have to provide medical insurance and pay 1/2 of all medical cost. As for gaining custody, unless you are a bad mother (addictions, negligent or abbusive), he would have the burden of proof to show it was in the child's best interest to have custody. This is hard to do unless, you give him easy material to work with. Just be a good mom. Be involved with your child, take them to church, keep a steady job, don't have men sleeping over and love your child and you will be just fine. Another thing a Judge would consider is why he took so long in getting tested. Should the Father have stepped up right away, a Judge would notice that positively but the longer he waits, the more irresponsible he looks. "What took so long?" Be a good mom and you will have nothing to worry about.
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