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pregnant and father wanting aborttion

 
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sunshine
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 8:35 pm    Post subject: pregnant and father wanting aborttion Reply with quote

hello,

I am pregnant and unmarried living in Florida. I am about 6 1/2 weeks pregnant. Since I do not love or marry him, the father to my baby is demanding for me to have an abortion. He also requested "proof" in documentation of the procedure.

This is my first child, since I could not carry a child due to a massive fibroid tumor I had for many years. The tumor was remove in 2004 using laser. Without this procedure, I would have lost my uterus.

I would like to keep this child. The father of child said I can keep it if we remain dating. But he he does not want the child if we are just friends. He does not feel it is the best situation for the child. I disagree with his rationing.

He said the best option (for him) would an abortion because he did not want a child showing up at his door-step later on wondering why he gave him up.

Being desparate I told him I would tell the child he was conceive through a sperm bank. This did not work.

Has anyone gone through this situation? And can I keep my child, since I am not married to him. I going to search Florida Statutes for more information. I was just wondering if someone could answer my question, or guide me in right direction.

I closing, I do not want to go through an abortion. He is not the one who has go through the procedure....and living with it.

Thank you for reading my topic
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lindsay
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 8:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi there. Sorry to hear about your situation. First off let me tell you that it is not up to him whether or not you keep the baby. It is YOUR decision. Don't let him force you to do something you do not want to do. Even if it means moving far away from him to protect yourself, then do so. Email me and we can talk some more.
Lindsay
LMFairley@hotmail.com
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nikki427
Guest





PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 8:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hi! i recently just went through a similar situation. my daughters father and i had this fling for about 4 years then i get pregnant and he doesn't want kids and he don't understand why i would bring a child in this world whos not going to have a dad. well needless to say i had the baby and it was the best decision i ever made in my life i dont know what i would do without her! follow your gut because he pressured me for 5 months day in and day out to have an abortion and i thank god every night that i believed in myself and my baby! i hope i could give you some light on your situation!
nikki
nikki4272004@yahoo.com
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brand0805



Joined: 05 Mar 2006
Posts: 1
State or Province: Wisconsin

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 7:33 pm    Post subject: You don't need him!!! Reply with quote

Hi there,
First off I think that you are strong enough to raise a child on your own. There is no reason to go through an abortion to "please" him. I had an abortion last year and there isn't a day that goes by that I'm at odds with myself. I have a six year old son and proud to say that I've done a darn good job with him. His dad is not involved and you know what? My son isn't missing a thing he is!!!! I'm not dissing abortion but there are plenty of single parents out there!!
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myzima2000



Joined: 07 Feb 2006
Posts: 74
State or Province: South Carolina

PostPosted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 9:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree with everyone here. this is your body and your decision if he does not want to be a father the child will never have to know who he is and you do not have to put him on the birth certificate. there are a lot of programs to help you until you get on your feet but having baby is the most wonderful exeperience you will ever have so dont pass that chance up if your really want the baby i would just tell that guy to get lost he is not worth having around any real man would not ask you to do that
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KatherineI



Joined: 20 Jan 2006
Posts: 16
State or Province: Pennsylvania

PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Pregnant in Florida,
I read your post and it is the reason I signed on again.

Abortion is not the answer. It is not for you...I can tell you right now after reading your message.

It's great that you want this child. It is wonderful having kids and raising them.

If he is pressuring you like this the options are to:

--move away from him
--disassociate your self with him
--end it now (give your self a timeline to meet this goal)...start hanging out with other people. Move away.

and then...
I would suggest that you talk to someone professional about your relationships. You don't want to get mixed up with someone else who is controlling like this again. Nor do you want to stay with someone who is controlling like this.
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Oliviasmom



Joined: 03 May 2006
Posts: 25
State or Province: Arizona

PostPosted: Mon May 15, 2006 11:00 am    Post subject: Hi there Reply with quote

First of all, the father of your baby cannot force you to get an abortion.

This guy sounds like a creep. If a guy ever gave me an ultimatum like that, I would break it off with him. Please consider doing the same. You do not need him.

If you want to have this child there are a few things you do need to think about. You may be doing it all alone, so prepare for that. Hopefully you have a job and some sort of financial and personal support.

Don't expect this guy is going to want to be a good dad. You can ask for child support, but he does not have to make things easy for you. If he comes around after the baby is born then great, but be advised since you are having a baby with someone that does not want it, he can try and make you miserable.

I would break it off with him personally, if he is going to try to tell you what to do with you body, or issue you childish ultimatums.

Being a mom is not easy, being a single mom is even harder but you can do it if you put your mind to it.

good luck
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marigallion



Joined: 10 Oct 2006
Posts: 9
State or Province: Alaska

PostPosted: Tue Oct 10, 2006 6:30 pm    Post subject: What makes him think he has any say in the matter? Reply with quote

When I hear about silly men thinking that they can manipulate the outcome of the pregnancy, I just want to laugh. The thing that's not funny is that girls like you end up being scared when you need to focus your energy on having a rewarding and healthy pregnancy. At this point, it is none of his G.D. bidness. Honey, the law is 100% on your side. And after the baby is born, and if you decide to nail him for the child support he OWES you, he still won't have any rights at all unless you slip up and decide to be nice, and I do not recommend forgiveness for this creep.
Love your baby, and love yourself enough to stay single until someone wonderful comes along!

Mari Gallion
www.singlepregnancy.com
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SundayForever



Joined: 08 May 2011
Posts: 3
State or Province: Alabama

PostPosted: Sun May 08, 2011 8:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Don't expect this guy is going to want to be a good dad. You can ask for child support, but he does not have to make things easy for you. If he comes around after the baby is born then great, but be advised since you are having a baby with someone that does not want it, he can try and make you miserable.
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