My right as a mother

molly · Guest

I am 7 months pregnant and the father of my child and I are not together, nor have we ever been. I already told him that I would give our daughter his last name but, after dicussing this with a few people in similar situations---I was told not to. I feel that he does not even deserve to give her his last name seeing that he has not done a thing through my entire pregnantcy. He has not even met my parents yet! Do I have the right to just give her my last name? I don't want him coming back to me with some lawyer telling me that I can't do this. What should I do and how do I find out about my rights as a mother?

Traceys · Guest

When I had my daughter, who is now 12, her father and I split when I was 3 months pregnant, we were never married. I put his name on the birth certificate, but my daughters last name is the same as mine, and it was the best choice. I am in California, and I do not know the laws by state, but I think you should have no problem at all giving her you last name. You have not been together, and he has no claim to demand that his last name be given to the baby. Stand your ground, and good luck.

Angels@Work · Guest

Well, my experience was my daughter carries the father's surname. Actual fact; should you have a daughter; the surname is inmaterial. However, should you have a son then the father's surname is required. Nevertheless, as the child grows older they definately respect you, because you are the most beautiful and wonderful mom. Therefore, in kind try not to confuse the child as they grow up.

Jane Says · Guest

Funny, I should join this sight today...THis morning I went to court to change my girl's last names to mine. I have 2 daughters from the same father--my ex husband--who I wanted to give them a name they could relate to and they would have a stronger since of identity. Their father has not paid child support since our divorce 5 years ago and has been minimal--a week per year--contact with them.
Don't go through this headache, give your child your name and if they want to change it when they are older--not likely--they can. By the way, this costs me over $500 in court fees.

fashndiva · Guest

In Ohio, you can give the child any last name you want. I was determined that she wouldn't have his last name (a fact which didn't sit well with him). It's much easier since she lives with me - she doesn't have to explain to anyone why her last name is different.

lucky12406 · Joined: 11 Aug 2006 Posts: 2 State or Province: Missouri

When my son was born I gave him my last name and left his father's name off of the birth certificate. He is trying to fight me about it now but he legally cannot change my son's last name or put his name on the certificate without my permission.

speedie1 · Joined: 30 Dec 2006 Posts: 8 State or Province: California

First of all file for full sole legal custody. most women think if the child is living with you then you have it but you don't. I am in California and the fathers name or information is not allowed to go on the birth certificate unless your married. But here you can give your cild any name you want.