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Trying to find my kids

 
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kayla1198
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 10:35 am    Post subject: Trying to find my kids Reply with quote

I was divorced in 1994 and my husband got custody because I felt he was a good father and could do better by them then I could at the time of the divorce and we were still friends. However he was with a women who has been in control over his life and my childrens since. I had regular visits with my children until about 4 years ago and then it became halted. I was having issues in my current marriage at the time that was unhealthy for my children to be around and my ex and I thought until things were better the kids shouldn't come over well his girlfriend took advantage of that. I no longer have any contact with them and my money situtation is not good enough to take him back to court and even if I could I can't locate him. I hate it. I love my children so much and I don't want them to think that I didn't or don't want to see them. I don't know what to do and I have other children that are half brother and sister's that don't understand why they can't see their brother and sisters. I don't know what I can or cannot do to find them or what legal action I can or cannot take. I need help! If anyone can tell me what to do I would be grateful. Thanks Shar
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Barb
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 10:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

kayla1198
Do you have court ordered visitation with your children?
If you do, then what he did is called kidnapping, you take your court order and go to the police department. You can petition the court for contempt charges against him. You do not need a lawyer to do that, go to the clerk of court and get the paper work, it will cost you to file but it is by far cheaper then paying a lawyer.
Barbara
Wisconsin
Mothers Unite!
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kayla1198
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 10:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Barb, Thank you! Yes I do have court ordered visitation. As well, I am suppose to have knowledge of their schooling as well as phone numbers, address and one month in the summer. It is all in the divorce decree. I again thank you so much. For the record he not only has not let me see our children but my mother, his mother, and other family members. I have to say I just always thought it would work itself out. That one day everything would go back to the way it was. I will NEVER forgive myself for not acting quicker to resolve this and I only hope because of my fears and stupidity that my children do not resent me for not acting quicker on their behalf. I just didn't want to upset my children fighting this out with their father and I didn't want to make him to look like the bad guy. Stupid, right! I also need to make something else a bit clearer. Although I said he got custody it was only because I gave it to him. I had full custody. He was ordered to pay a whopping 87 dollars a week to me for 3 children one who was still in diapers and on formula. I was living in my parents home and both of my brother's still lived there. Next thing I know he has bought a home?! Imagine my shock. He could only afford to pay me $87 a week and now he has a home? Well long story short I wanted my children to have their own space and I wanted them not to have to deal with people other then the parent trying to raise them. So out of mind set that my children would be better with their father, my life has basicly gone to hell in a hand basket.
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lisamarie10
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 10:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

hi, I am in the same situation, my topic is under battling ex and new wife take a look, and also look into legal aid, and my ex wouldnt let me see my kids because he said my husband wasnt nice to them, but I went to the court house in my small town, where money means everything, and I got a paper no lawyer for my self and I took him to court for contempt he had a lawyer, but I got my kids back visiting me, I have two boys by him and I have two in my current marriage, and now he and his new hate full wife are trying to take my children, but anyways I went and got a paper to take him to court and had to jave papers served on him, only costs me 15.00 and at fist the clerk of court said they had never heard of these papers but they had just gave them to me, so i persuade this and they didnt wont to help me but I told my self I wasnt leaving that court house til someone helped me, I went to legal aid and they told me if they gave me these forms that they had to file them and the woman at legal aid told me to go back and have them failed and I did, took me a few weeks to get him served but my children were worth it, I was broke but determined, and I guess noone else had use these forms before because you have to prove your case and I did, but his lawyer was not easy top go uop against, I have a lawyer now because he was my mother in laws lawyer and heard about me through her. you hang in there, its tough and if you read my story you will see your not alone.
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lisamarie10
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 10:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

these papers are contempt papers, because if you have court order visitations you have him, and about locating him try his social security number, Dont give up!!!!
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Worried About My Babies
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 10:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hello,
I'm also trying to find my kid's.My situation is a little diffrent. My children were placed in foster care becouse I was an addicted mother, and I could not take care of them. I gave up my parental rights so my kids could be adopted by my uncle and his wife.This was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.I wanted them to have a good life in a nice home and with family so I could stay in contact.It didnt turn out that way. My daughter needed a therapist becouse she was molested while she was in the system.But in state of Oklahoma they did not provied any therapy that would be of any help to my baby, so they removed my kids from their home and moved them back to California. I've been trying to find a way to get them back sence then.Im not the same person I was before. I have been clean for close to five years, Im a drug and alcohol counsler. I have two kids besides my older two.And Im a very good mother to them. I am also able to be a good mother to my older children.I have only one problem I dont have my own house. I just want my kids to know that I love them and I always have loved them and Ill never give up.Any comments are welcome I dont know what else to do!!!!!
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Julie Johnson
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 10:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You should visit www.nancm.com. We are supportive mothers going thru very difficult times right now with our children. Please email me at sunnydays1776@aol.com. You will be in my prayers. Julie Johnson
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