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Single Mother in GA needs help

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 2:11 pm    Post subject: Single Mother in GA needs help Reply with quote

Can any one make this night mare go away? Our single daughter who is almost 24 has a four year old daughter. Although they live with us. She has always worked and paid for her daughters upbringing without help. Our grandaughters father left with in a month after her birth. Within in four months he was married and had another daughter within a year. He is not on my granddaughters birth record and has never paid child support of any type. Four months ago he saw my daughter up town and threatened that he was going to get a DNA test and start getting visitation rights and that since he worked for cash she would not get child support. He has never been able to keep a job anyway, and he has been in trouble with the law in the past. We have been told that he has tattoos relating to drug use. We contacted a lawyer. She told us that there was really nothing we could do, but wait it out. She told us that in the State of Ga. the courts believe the father has rights. Well he has not been in her life for four years and is only doing this to hurt my daughter.We did not hear any thing else but just when we start feeling a little easy it starts back up. The newspaper for our town carried a birth anouncement for his new son. Our grandaughters name was listed as a sister. Since he
is not listed on her birth record as his father she does not have his last name. How can he put in the paper that she is his sons sister. What can we do. How can this be fair to my daughter and my grandaugher.[/i]
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 2:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

More than likely this man is only trying to get on your family nerves,because if he wanted to be a father to this little girl he would have been in her life a long time ago.He proably realized that you and your daughter doesn't need him or care about him.Just give it sometime he proably go away just don't address him or let him feel that he has power over you.
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 2:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It never is fair, but I would see your lawyer and do what you can to prepare for him being in your granddaughter's life. Even if he never does anything, she will see him and know that he is her father in the future. Lies and secrets have a way of coming out. Short of moving, I don't see that you have much choice except to get a good lawyer and make him pay child support if he insits on visitation. No court is going to give him overnight visitation anytime soon unless he starts actually being a real father. And it doesn't sound like he will anytime soon. But you all do need to prepare your granddaughter about her father and it would be best for everyone if they did have some sort of relationship. And I know it has to be mostly on his shoulders.

I commend you and your husband for taking in your daughter and granddaughter, not all parents are so kind and they miss out on a lot of love.
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 29, 2006 2:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow...I was looking for some information my wife and came across this site. It makes me realize how silly our problems are. I also give you credit. If more peoplr had great parents like you the world would be a far better place. As for your situation, if the father is not on the birth record, I would think that the courts would need a DNA test before granting him any visitation. I can't believe that a looser like thjis would actually get up off his butt and get tested. When and if he does, which I think he will not, your daughter should seek full custody and then she can dictate when and how visitation occurs. I know you have love in you hearts, but remember a childs love is not something that should be for sale. He should not have to pay childsupport to love his daughter, BUT...he should not be allowed to get to know her if he is a danger to her (The wreckless type.) All of this can be shown in court. Life is full of nasty stuff and we have to remember that it is not where we go, it's how we get there that matters. Live your lives to the fullest and simply deal with the curve balls that come your way. You daughter and granddaughter will both become strong and wise by your examples.
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