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Pregnancy and Alone

 
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bbygrl2005
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 9:57 pm    Post subject: Pregnancy and Alone Reply with quote

There should be laws for mother's who went through their pregnancies alone.

I went through my 42 weeks of pregnancy alone. And, my daughter was 2 months old before my husband decided he wanted anything to do with her. Now that he's decided to pretend to be father of the year, the courts have given him joint legal custody. I want to know why he can have the same legal rights to my daughter that I have? I should have the right to say when and if he gets visitation at all. If the decision was his, my daughter wouldn't be here right now. I want to know why the laws have not been changed to reflect such issues. And, why he has the same legal rights I have? He has let his motive be known. He is using my daughter to try and keep control of me. He has stated that he has driven by my house at all hours of the night. And, the courts apparently find this acceptable behavior. He left my daughter ill without informing either myself or the doctor's. She can't even speak or walk yet. The courts told me it's because he's a first time father. I told them that it shouldn't matter because I'm a first time mother who sought medical treatment for her. They told me that it's because I have maternal instincts. I told them that sounds like a form of sexual discrimination. My question is: Why????

Sorry for complaining.

bbygrl2005
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lost
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 9:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

im scared of that happening to me. i was just wondering if you have ever heard of getting full rights to the child before its even born? ive heard of it but no one can tell me how to do it
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Barb
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 9:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

bbygrl2005

You have very good questions.
The courts can give no common sense answers to your questions. The fathers rights organizations have become politically powerful and have gotten the laws changed in their favor. Fathers who want custody are winning, hands down, with no questions asked! The fathers rights organizations are full of abusive, violent, controlling, men, and they all know how to shed their phoney tears for the judge. I believe with all my heart that these judges who are doing these unspeakable acts to our children know excatly what they are doing and don't give a care, because of all the federal money that is supporting these actions against our children. What is going on in the court rooms across America is just one more act of violence against women and children.
In tne violence against women act PAS is considered an act of violence against women.
Richard Gardners, "Parent aleination syndrome" nothing more then a legal defense for fathers who are sexually molesting their own children and getting away with it legally.
Having maternal instincts is not sexual discrimination, its something mothers have that men do not have. We as mothers no not have a hard time figuring out what our children need and want. Men don't have a clue!!
This horrible discrimination against mothers and children is not going to stop until we as mothers and women Unite and make it stop.
Divided we fall United we stand!

Barbara
Wisconsin
Mothers Unite!!
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SaraB
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 9:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I completely agree. A father's responsibility should start at the beginning. Not just when he wants it to! The father of my child left me when i was a month along and she is now 7 months old and he's asking for joint out of the blue. I was told i can have him get supervised visitation but may eventually get joint.
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slbennett1025@yahoo.com
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 9:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

For bbygrl2005, Barbara and SaraB,

Sorry ladies, it's ugly but all too true. Everything Barbara said is correct! This has been ongoing for far too long now. My daughters and I have been caught in the spider web of injustice, but the funny thing is.....we've committed no crime, yet we are punished as though we have been. For the longest time I thought I had done something wrong but knew in my heart I had done nothing. How can the courts just give "strangers" even if they are the biological fathers custody??? We are trying to get together and make a change. It seems that it's a nationwide epidemic and we need to "cure" it. As usual, men make these messes and it's up to the women to have to "clean" it. I most definitely blame our court system. They have turned our Constitutional rights away but what's worse is that is has been taken from our children that have no voice to speak. I'm not blaming all men, but a good father would NEVER take the children from the mother EVER!!!! It's discrimination all the way! Sara, no offense, but don't be surprised.
The fathers can just come in the courtrooms and demand something and POOF..it works in their favor. It's beyond sick and demented what's happening and yet us mothers are not able to protect our own. I don't think I can ever find it in my heart to "forgive" these corrupt officials. They can't give us back the time or our lives....all they did was help to destroy it.

It's definitely a nationwide problem and I have met mothers/children from quite a few states and yet it keeps on going. It has to STOP!!! Susan
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Tminbc
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 10:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I really feel for your situation sometimes men use custody to control us...
I think if he wasn't there to help you stay healthy,fed,taken care of during your pregnancy he was not doing his part already. Men should be there for the pregnancy, I gave birth to one of my children alone, I was angry for a long time that he didnt even visit.. I'm sorry you had to go through your pregnancy alone and I wish we had more power as mothers. Stay strong and positive our children will grow up one day and will know right from wrong, they will also know our stories and these men will be accountable for what they've done against our maternal rights.
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Queenmother
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 10:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am currently in the mist of a custody battle with my ex-abuser and I am amazed at the research I have read. He is textbook in his methods. I went through my pregnancy alone while he decieded that I "should have an abortion" and went to find himself and basically dissappeared the entire pregnancy. He did'nt do much after my child was born by way of time or finance and needless to say when I refused his advances, wham I am in court. He filed a measly 6-page document filled with lies and suddenly I am amist brainwashers trying to convince me that this man who choked me slapped me raped me kicked me spat on me and called me every #@$%^^ under the sun is "here now" and "he's trying". Cry me a river. I cry when I think of how this man damaged me and my older children and pray he does not do the same to "our" child.
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