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Mother in need of some advice

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Joined: 07 Apr 2009
Posts: 3
State or Province: Ohio

PostPosted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 11:08 pm    Post subject: Mother in need of some advice Reply with quote

I have 2 children, a son that is 5 and a daughter that is now 6 but, my daughter was taken from my custody in May 14, '08 and was placed in her fathers for temp custody by a cpo. I was working 3rd shift and had a sitter for the night time but not during the day until about 5 at night. I had fallen asleep and my children had gotten out of the house after I had put chain locks on the door because they had gotten out of the house another time. The police issued 2 child endangerment charges. One was lowered to an m4 and the other was amended, I had no history in the courts. My daughters father called children services and they were involved for 30 days in which ended with a report of neglect due to my children getting out of the house but they didn't take my children, they just said to get a babysitter or else they would take them and I cried to my landlord and she ended up helping me find one. My daughters father went to the DV court and the judge issued the cpo even though he admitted to smoking marijuana. I recently tried to regain custody but it was dismissed for lack of evidence on my behalf and by his evidence of our daughter getting out of the house and our daughter also losing the nail and tip of her finger by an accident in which she had stuck her finger in a paper shredder in which they stated she wasn't properly supervised but I was atually doing the dishes and on the phone with her father when it happened. He even only showed up for an hour at the hospital and then left, I stayed with her all night and drove her to childrens hospital. Even after it happened, on the weekend he had her, she would cry out for me and he would ask me to come get her and I always did. I had ended up getting a cpo on him due to my daughter saying her father said, he wished I would die and would shoot myself and due to his constant belittlement and cursing at me. He has had 4 different girlfriends around my daughter and in mid Jan '09 moved a girl in to his home in which our daughter didn't even know and had only met 2 times, to help take care of our daughter. My daughter has told me several things like her father left her with her 2 younger brothers to go to the mailbox which is in front of the trailer park, she told me her father let her drive in the culdesac on his lap. She also stated to me she had showered with this new girlfriend of her fathers and stated that she has boob rings and that I should get them. She also said she she's her daddy's member all the time, he stated that she walks in on him a lot. I had my daughter 15 days in the month of March '09 but her father will not give me anything court wise, he says he has control now. I've called legal aid and they say they cant help, I've called children services everytime my daughter has told me something and they wont investigate. He is so hard to deal with and get along with now that he has custody. I pay child support but I also have her half of the time, I have her the same amount of time as her father does. He stated in court that he doesn't believe our daughter is safe in my care but yet he lets me have her a lot so, he basically lied. He has even tried to get back together with me on several occasions but, I was reluctant to do so. I have custody of my son which is from my soon to be ex husband and he misses his sister as well as I. I want to be taking care of our daughter and be involved in her life without having her father control everything and let his new girlfriend raise our daughter. He leaves our daughter with her all the time. I had him arrested for violation of a protection order on Feb 10 '09 because he was calling me and cursing at me. The day he got out on Feb 12 '09 he had me arrested for a violation of a protection order because on Feb 9 '09 I had went to his place to drop off our daughters bookbag for school and to drop off clothes that I had bought for her. I have the recording of him asking me to come over that morning to drop off our daughters bookbag. He said that if he got in trouble then he thought I should get in trouble to. The cpo's have both been dropped because her father said if I would drop the cpo on him, then he would drop the one on me between my daughter and I, an attorney advised me that it would be better for me if I would agree to drop the cpo. At times, I have almost thought about just giving up because of how hard this has been on me, fighting and struggling to see my daughter and him being able to tell me when I can have our daughter or when I cannot.

He has told me that he has plans on moving to portsmouth, Ohio, where his father lives and his cousins live but, my daughter has 3 brothers that live up here and portsmouth is 2 hours away. He also said something about trucking school or working on the railroad in which he would be working for 28 days and then come back for 14 days and then going back out so, basically his gf of 3 months would be taking care of our daughter. I know that a lot of these could be threats but even still its hard to deal with. I am not a bad mother, I dont do drugs, I drink like maybe once a month if that, my kids have a roof, plenty of clothes, food, they get plenty of nurturing. I am wanting to find out if I have any chance at regaining custody of our daughter. I know what could have happened to my children that day they got out and thank the lord everyday , that nothing happened to my children but, how was it bad enough to get my daughter taken away but not my son. I'll be honest, I was in a bad depressive state when my daughter was taken away and have gotten over it and I've been fighting to get her back but without a lawyer it seems I can't get anywhere. I raised our daughter for 5 years with no problems until this. We are both unemployed now due to the economy but collect unemployment. I only have about $2,500 for an attorney but am willing to use it if I have to, nothing is more important than my children. Please help, I really need some advice on this situation.
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Still in Love

Joined: 05 Sep 2006
Posts: 216
State or Province: California

PostPosted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 12:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You need an attorney... get one.
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