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I AM SHANNON A NEWBIEAND FRUSTURATED

 
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shannon1975



Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 1
State or Province: Michigan

PostPosted: Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:01 am    Post subject: I AM SHANNON A NEWBIEAND FRUSTURATED Reply with quote

Wink As I sit here and write this my heart is breaking.In sept 2008 I filed for a divorce from my husband of almost 12 years we have a daughter at the time she was 11...almost 12.I told him I did not love him ,my love for her has only grown stronger and deeper.but yet she has grown away from me and the courts the state of michigan only screws me over more and more each time we have joint custody but it is I who is paying child support all because he is on public assistance...he grades are beyond bad.she has missed an excessive amount of school we are talking almost 30 days just this past school year alone(i realize some were due to the fact that yes she did have surgery but it was over spring break)but he has been a let down she has clearly not been his number #1 priority..I KEEP GIVING HIM EVERY OPRUTUNITY to try to make it right and he is not...he seems to think because she lives with him he is gonna call all the shots.....so I now have to make the hardest decision to remove her knowing the bond that her and her dad have but she has not showing me nothing poor grades lack of respect for me for herself she does not take care of herself,her weight is out of control....she was once a 4.0 honor student her last report card 4'f's 1 a 1 b..if i allow her to stay in that house with her father that does not make me any better of a parent.....not only do i pay the child support i continue to supply all her clothes shoes coats boots hair cuts highlights ect....i lost my job in dec 2008 i get my unemployment but friend of court never put the order in so up until sept of 2009 i was paying almost 300.00 a month in support..and the sad part i will not even so much as get a credit towards any of this...next week it will run out my husband new husband works hard everyday makes great money takes care of us but it is not his obligation to care for my daughter....it is mine....she needs to be here he pays for her bcbs the 300.00 a month dental vision and health...[/quote]
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Hannah03



Joined: 30 Jun 2010
Posts: 3
State or Province: Alberta

PostPosted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 12:28 am    Post subject: frustrated to Reply with quote

Hi Shannon, I can relate with you in a way i suppose. Almost 7 years ago now, I left my husband. I left with my 2 sons then 2 and 6. The 6 year old was from a guy in high school, the two year old from my husband whom i left. I left because the age difference did not work after all and he was really mean and abusive toward my 6 year old, and me. Then at the same time i left his mother passed away, she was ill. So when he arrived back after 3 months of being by her bedside and the funeral, I was gone. I had to I was to scared to leave if he was around. Then he pleaded with me, to let our son stay with him. He lost his mom he needed his son bla bla. So since i have a big heart i allowed the arrangement. Then the divorce papers stated 50 50 custody on his upbringing, with both of us paying support. Well I always maintained a great and stable relationship with my son. Then now almost 3 years have gone by that my ex has been moved 5 hours away with our son who is now 9. He first off moved and never informed me until 5 weeks later, right before school was about to start. I was devastated, not knowing where my son was for 5 weeks, and phoning and phoning. Well then there was this great boom here where I live, and no lawyer would touch the case. Now I finally got a great lawyer, but am so scared to lose. My son has said he wants to live here, and be with his siblings, (i have a new baby 4 mo old), but his dad states to him he can't live with me, cause he owns him. I have a battle to fight for my son and it is so hard to stay strong, and keep the relationship with my new husband of 6 years sane. He loves all the kids and wants me to get custody. It is really crazy that i am parenting 2 other children very well but have to prove myself for another. My ex just hates me. He is going on the fact that i have mental health issues, Well i think all mothers would agree a bout of postpartum depression is not a mental health problem, but somthing that comes with having a baby. I know I have blabed on to long, but I literaly have no one eles to talk to about this, and i feel so alone. I also think you need to do what you have to do to proteck your daughter and guide her in the right direction of life. She will thank you later. It will be tough but I seen the teen trouble my mom went through with my little sis, and today they are the best of friends. Hope we can chat and help each other out a bit with advice and just listening.
Thanks Hann
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