Joined: 04 Jul 2015
State or Province: Michigan
|Posted: Sat Jul 04, 2015 8:31 pm Post subject: dad consistently leaves son waiting...
|My son is 5 and I recently separated from his father. I live with my son full time and my ex now lives with his mom.
He had been unemployed for too way long and finally got a job when I kicked him out. Which was great initially.
My ex claims his schedule is different every day and he never knows day by day how long or if he'll work at all. Because of this, he never schedules specific plans to spend time with our son. He is always vague with his answers of when he will be able to see him. When I express my concerns and let him know that all this instability is not good for a child, his bad temper comes out and it's difficult to have a normal discussion over this.
Like tonight for example, he called our son at noon and told him as soon as he was done with work he would stop over. It is now 9pm and we haven't heard from him at all. My son is sad and frustrated and questions me about why dad isn't coming over. I feel so bad for him.
I have yet to file for child support, but I am waiting for a couple things to fall in line before I do. I would like to set up some kind of regular custody plan, but my ex keeps saying it's impossible with his job.
What kind of job leaves you hanging about your work schedule day to day? Nobody can live that way, unable to plan ahead for anything, especially if you have children.
I don't want to keep my son away from seeing his dad, but he will not talk to his boss about his need for a consistent schedule since he has to share custody.
I hope to start the child support ball rolling in a couple more months.
Can the courts force him to co-operate with working out a regular and consistent custody plan for the betterment of our son?
It's either that, or I will have to refuse to settle for all this waiting around in case dad shows up or not and severely limit the time my son sees his dad, which will break his little heart, but it's already broken with disappointment and frustration whenever dad pulls a no show.
His dad always apologizes profusely and explains he was stuck at work all night and says how much he loves him and he wants to see him.
I try to let my son know that dad is not doing this on purpose and he has to work, but it's happening so much now that I see my son is getting tired of the "i had to work" excuse.
I tell his dad not to make any promises he can't keep, but this is a am almost daily thing.
Plus, I'd like to start dating in the future and this puts a damper on any plans I'd like to make for myself.
Who can I look to for help with this matter? Is it unreasonable of me to expect a semi-consistent custody plan?