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Medical Needs Son not getting proper care

 
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sammy4mom



Joined: 06 Jul 2006
Posts: 4
State or Province: Louisiana

PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 1:52 pm    Post subject: Medical Needs Son not getting proper care Reply with quote

Sad I am new to this board, but need advise. My son spends the summer across the US with his father. He is a medical needs child and doesn't quite get the care he needs. This caused major problems (seizures) last summer and I had a signed court filed agreement put into place this summer that no medical changes or tests would be done without his doctor's consent. It seems that the problem from last year is starting to repeat itself, regardless of the precautions that I have taken to protect my 5 year old child. At what point can I deem this a medical emergency on my part and pick up my child early from his summer visitation without breeching the custody agreement in place. And when/if that time comes (which considering all the circumstances I feel is now) how do I go about getting him -- as I'm sure if I just show up his father will not just hand him over and I want this to be as un-upsetting as this can be for my son. I try to keep him out of the loop as far as his fathers faults are concerned -- He does not (at least when he's with me -- with is most of the time) hear the fights or hear any negative comments from anyone here about his father. However, he's come home from his fathers saying some pretty cruel and hurtful things about myself, his step father, and his family here -- not intentionally but because it was contiunally told to him while on his visits. Any advise would be much appreciated. Thanks!!! Sad
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FamFreedom



Joined: 06 Jul 2006
Posts: 5
State or Province: Pennsylvania

PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 2:34 pm    Post subject: Medical needs child Reply with quote

I feel for you when it comes to medical needs children. I just had a minor medical issue with my son. I couldn't imagine one where there is seizures involved.

My son's medical condition was asthma) and his father consistently refused to get rid of his cat (even though our son is very, very allergic and conistently it triggered my son's asthma)...how insensitive and irresponsible is that.

Anyway, I would document it of course, but the questionof whether it is deemed a medical emergency would probably have to me around the time of the incident.

I'm afraid to say take him out of there b/c that can lead to court intervention...and you know that that can be terrible....we all want to keep out of court. But..



The court will take into consideration the best interest of the child when making the decision.

If the court feels that you are acting in the best interest of the child a guardian ad litem may be appointed to help in making decisions on the behalf of the child. (that's why I think maybe a letter to the court could be valuable---or maybe having it brought out at mediation)


If you decide though be prepared for the evaluation (medical by the court) to take at least four to six weeks if not longer.

No matter how strongly you believe you would be the parent who would have the best interest in mind and should have custody of the child be prepared for the court to decide against you. Be ready to accept the courts decision and move forward to work with your ex-spouse. (just so you keep your sanity).

He unfortunately may think that you are using it as a negotiating chip, but you are not.

Also, the fact that you bring it up to a court or bring him to mediation might light a fire under his butt.


I
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sammy4mom



Joined: 06 Jul 2006
Posts: 4
State or Province: Louisiana

PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 3:03 pm    Post subject: well . . . Reply with quote

Thanks for the reply. See the problem is my son is Diabetic -- type one and just recently on the road to being controlled. His father has done nothing in the past two year but try to disprove this diagnosis. I am the primary domililary parent, but he has summer visitation. No I don't want to be in court or worse, but I also won't allow my son's health to continue to be affected. We already have the courts setting a date for change in child support (as he was not paying -- especially medical) and also to bring up such issues and have them addressed more formally so that maybe they no longer happen. But until the court date is set and we have the hearing (which is likely that my son will be back from his visitation anyway) I am sick with worry for my 5 year old. I am having his meter (glucose meter) readings that were fwded to me from his dad (hopefully they are accurate) and I'm having them reviewed by his primary physician here -- if he deems it necessary to see my son in his office, he will put it in writing and forward it to my attorney so that I can pick him up and hopefully that is good enough (for now) for the courts?? thanks again for your advice Very Happy
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